xuan

2007-01-15T18:32:00.000+08:00

HTTP://WWW.XANGA.COM/ABOVE

BYEBYE THATSMILE-
(:

2007-01-02T01:34:00.000+08:00

trying to make kwonsimoo admit that she loves you at 1.30am in the morning is not easy AT ALL. audreykhoo, i am hurt! :'(

2007-01-02T00:18:00.000+08:00

HELLO 2007

goodbye 2006?
heh, just wanna thank God for 2006 and all the blessings He showered me with throughout the year. am truly thankful for all the aaamaaaziiiinggg people He's blessed me with : new friends & old(: i couldnt have possibly gotten through 2006 without all these people and of course my wonderful Saviour!
the list of people i will miss goes on and on and on. i really really love you guys.
orientation is very soon. im rather excited actually :D

bunch dinner today at ichiban boshi at the esplanade(: only 5/7 made it. i realised how dinners/outings like that would not be as often as before(due to our busy schedules?) but i really really want bunch to be as bunch-ey as ever 20 years down the road.I LOVE THAT BUNCH.my fun loving, crazy friends and the stupid things we do(:

eh Deirdre the mother boon Nah, my bestie boon! i love you like shit. our 5 phonecalls a day will be missed. our nightly chats, walking together & being honest too. i think i'll feel damn weird not hearing your whinyass voice everyday. thanks for everything! i love you <3 (farewell letter soon, i promise)

eh Kat the fathleen Ong. I NEED YOU. and of course you know i love you cos i always remind you :D thanks for being there always my friend. you mean alot to me and you need to know that! haha i dont think words can ever describe how thankful i am for you. You're a blessing. you know? <3

eh Gourie the lover. dont you dare go around getting new lovers you get? YOU ARE MINE. hahaha, i love you lah pans. you never fail to make me smile & your hugs are the best! (: i will miss you so you better keep on organising more & more bunch outings at weird restaurants.(no more three monkeys cafe, PLEASE) i love you! <3

eh Steph the armrest Tan. you are my favourite employer & armrest. thankyoo for your present today it was sooo beautiful & sweet. SMILE okay? your laughter is contagious. and so was your tiredness today. although we always argue on who shld be the ultimate armrest, i still love you alot! (: you're the best employer of all time [and my shoulder is always here for you to rest lah ok -.- ] unless i grow taller than you one day, i will always be your favourite&best armrest. <3 love you!

ahh tired. goodnight(:

2006-12-29T12:19:00.000+08:00

"I believe we would worry a lot less and enjoy our lives a lot more if only we realise this truth: Our Abba Father is so strong that there is nothing He cannot do, and He is so loving that there is nothing He will not do for us!"

i have not forgotten. i cannot. the truth is beautiful, something we can hold on to and trust in this ever changing world. in the midst of chaos, we can only truly find our perfect rest in Jesus. when i look to Him, thats when all my worries & troubles seem so small. when i cry out to Him, everything thats bothering me has no choice but to run away. He is for me. He who is bigger than all things, is for ME. thank God for today, it seems like the first time im staying home to rest & have time for myself. i dont know why i've been so busy lately or what i've been labouring for. i knw its 'labour' and 'worry' cos i wrote down somewhere that ' labour exhausts, and worry is labour'. to be honest, i havent been the most faithful and devoted thing. & i havent been rejoicing over blessings. usually i wld jump up & down and praise God when i see blessings like that. but lately, i feel so tired & old. too tired to jump about or even say a word of praise. i havent been talking to God much & i havent been talking about Him much either. i miss my Abba. i think i forgot the fact that He is always here with me and i miss Him. I know He misses me so much more. sometimes i wonder how my Heavenly Father, so almighty and perfect, could put up with such ungrateful & fickle brats like me. but He does anyway, He does put up with & love me despite and inspite of me. wow, such an amazing love dont you think? (: that's something humans can never achieve. unconditional love.
Now, despite of all i've done or have failed to do, i know He still loves me all the same. and THAT, makes me love Him more. that makes me more grateful & that makes me wanna run back into His arms and dance in His presence (: that is grace. grace grace grace grace grace. i thought i knew all about grace when i learnt about it at church. but till now, i am still learning about God's perfect grace. i still dont know all about it. to me, its impossible to know or understand fully the things of God. cos when you think He loves you this much, He actually loves you more. in the case of God, its always MORE, more and much more. ABUNDANCE. overflow, exceedingly, beyond all that you can ever think or ask. so i want to know MORE AND MORE of Him each day. i may have strayed from Him but He always leads me back on the right track.
its like, a kid lost in a crowded mall. it may have happened because he was too preoccupied with some toy. his fault. but after hours of searching, im sure his parents wld embrace him and be thankful for his return instead of reprimanding him.
okay bad example :/ , ahh, like a shepherd losing his sheep and finally bringing it back in His arms instead of beating the sheep to death. HEH
thank God, He still blesses me with showers of blessings & the company of great people despite all my crap. friends are one of God's greatest blessings, indeed.

i miss my lover btw. LOVER! see you on 1st jan (: you are supposed to organise the outing. silly pans. i dont think you'll see this. AHH O:

2006-12-18T22:28:00.000+08:00

japan

share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=0BbMnLZu2aMXJg

<3 just for clarissa lim my loveliest friend in the whole wide world

to clare: happy now? i bet you're grinning to yourself and thinking of how awesome a friend i am

2006-12-18T18:58:00.001+08:00

To : You who care about me

RE : I am still alive

Hello there,
I have returned from Japan(!!!) :] Ok, that is old news. I'm flying off to Macau tomorrow morning and will be back on the 23rd. Please remember to remember me while I am away. By the grace of God, Japan trip was blessed and unforgettable. It was my first time going overseas without my family. First time i bathed with so many people, (and even accidently saw charmaine choy and clarissa so.. bare and naked). it was... GROSS! 18 in a room was so cosy and nice, just like one big family (: I think this trip made me a more independent and OPEN person(clare's influence?) ah, i shall spare you the boring details(you can read about the trip at : http://iridescentbeads.blogspot.com) the trees in Japan are really pretty and i tried to capture many beautiful things. but i guess you really have to be there to feel it. like the fireworks in disneyland :D videos and photos are just not as good as the real thing(even with the best camera)thats what i learnt. Heh, disneyland was... one word : extravagant! everything was supersized man. I also discovered my love for thrilling rollercoasters! heh, though i freaked out at superland :] all in all, the trip and the exchanges we had was superb! i dont regret any minute of it (: and did i mention i love batchies and the section.
NOW i am a busy girl! i really really miss my lovely friends like crap.

to : you-know-whoS
thank you for the wonderful day (: i love you all like shit lah okay. actually i doubt you will read this but whatever. haha, will miss everything!

to : xinya
I MISS YOU and your cute msgs which show how much you understand me. hahaha, meet up soon PLEASE :D

2006-12-18T18:58:00.000+08:00

2006-12-07T15:07:00.000+08:00

flyyinggg to japan in a few hours! four years of band and countless tiring band pracs end with this trip (: HAHA, its gonna be good man. i know it, cos i have God's good promises to hold on to :D

\crowned with favour, clothed in righteousness, held safe in my Abba's arms, i am leaving! haha, plus my exploding luggage(:

KATHLEEN ONG XINWEI. (if you ever see this) : I MISS YOU LIKE CRAP. i wanna hear your kangaroo stories okay! my present too! hehehe :D days without you are a little weird.

dear shar, i will definitely remember what you said when i see my plane food kay? (: haha you're cute and i miss you too. FATS! i shall go and call you now.

HAVE FUN!

2006-11-26T17:20:00.000+08:00

we can never be satisfied. let us just be contented with what we already have?

:D quite an unexpectedly good day. spent half of it sleeping. but.. somehow i feel back again, alive again, happy and rested (: thank You Lord. thank God for ethel. heehee :D was late for serving yet again :/

the desire for acceptance.
we try and try to get what we want, thinking that God doesnt want to/ cannot help us. sometimes its because we find our desires "not Godly", eg. materialistic desires? sometimes its because we find our desires too small for the Almighty to even bother about. surely He understands, He is the One who created you! surely He wants to help, His love for you is higher than the heavens. i know that my Abba knows every part of me even better than i do myself. my most secret desires, those i keep in my heart. all the questions i have(however stupid they might seem). HE KNOWS, HE UNDERSTANDS. He wont just sit there and say "ok, let's see how you're gonna get through this". He wants His precious children to sit at His feet and ask Him. ask Him for your supply, ask Him for wisdom, ask Him for this, for that... He never runs out! He is ever willing to GIVE GIVE GIVE. He died so that we may have life, and life more abundantly. life meant to be enjoyed, not a life where we toil and labour to get what we want. a life well taken care of by Him(: He is the Provider and my Father. He freely gives me all things.

it took me so long to realise that unconciously i was labouring, running after so many things. this is not for me to worry or labour. since He put these desires in my heart, He will help me and satisfy them(: like a dog going in rounds trying to catch its tail, but he finally stops "pursuing" it, the tail will follow him wherever he goes!

But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be GIVEN to you as well
Matthew 6:33

(: this life You've given.
the Lord bless you and keep you safe!

2006-11-24T23:51:00.000+08:00

fill me up with love +

i need it, perfect love casts out all fear. (i know i have it) love that never leaves or forsakes, love that is unconditional, asking nothing in return (:

oh (very)tiring but pleasant(overall?) day. those days are back to stay :/ cant really believe i got myself into this yet again. hurr. still, time spent with ppl i care abt was priceless. eh clarissa lim cj/ president- dfc, you make me laugh till i slant to one side. haha. i dont know what i'd do without you lah(i think you know what i mean) we need to go to our favourite place to play with the sand and look at the clouds soon. maybe we can do some amath hahaha.

yuping is so silly. (lipstick tastes funny)(yu an is fat)

Abba you give me strength and wisdom!

more than i could hope or dream of.

more than words can say
more, by all mores...

2006-11-23T14:24:00.000+08:00

GRAD NIGHT 06 :D

2006-11-23T13:47:00.000+08:00

2006-11-21T23:50:00.000+08:00

2006-11-21T01:40:00.000+08:00

life after o levels is loads of walking, shopping, talking, sleeping at unearthly hours, dinners and love? (: i am lacking REST! busybusy : prom, toccata, shopping&eating. i dont even have time to watch much tv! i know my Abba wants me to REST.
i finally went to vivocity today. it was just a gigantic shopping mall which makes you feel like you're in malaysia and has nice rooftop view overlooking the sea. i FINALLY decided on my dress after 3 days of searching from orchard to vivo. yea, my legs nearly broke but thank God for supernatural leg power(?)! (: sis says i am too fussy.poo, i dont know :/ got the toccata score from audrey today. man, im afraid. but in my prefect weakness is God's perfect strength. i did doubt, but i KNOW that nothing is too big/small for my Daddy to handle. my problem is in His hands, and He will make a way for me. just like how He led me through all the difficulties that i was faced with in the past, He will help me now(: surely, surely He wont give me more than i can bear. when you're faced with some problem, its not because God wasnt powerful enough to stop the problem from happening. its because He has looked at it waaay before you saw it, He looked at the problem and said : approved. my child can handle this. with my strength i will help her and she'll emerge strong and victorious! (:
i believe in His power and i believe He loves me more than anything. He does, really.

oh, i must tell about SATURDAY (:
SATURDAY 18TH NOV06
THE BUNCH of seven went out to dinner at the 3 monkeys restaurant! it was to celebrate yuxuan and phoebe's birthdays. i had FUN! and joy filled my heart (: despite being distracted by many transvestites and prostitutes walking past the restaurant, and being SCAREEEDDD by a very furry human sized monkey, i truly enjoyed myself. the company was irreplacable :D i love the bunch alotalot man! after dinner we tried to be tourists and took photos with christmas decors along orchard road, cheered for a (lousy cheena)band we didnt know, took a photo on the road, and had failed attempts of scaring the crowd, etcetc. all the stupid stuff that we do. but it made me happy and i enjoyed myself (: oh, not forgetting the interesting afternoon with boondeirdre, we walked till we (almost)dropped to vent (my) frustrations. leg pain!
I REALLY REALLY LOVE THE BUNCH. (kat, jan, gou, dee, steph, phoe, I <3 YOU ALL. thank you for the awesome time together!!) hee, i suddenly rmb escape after prelims(with my white transparent-when-wet shorts) and the haunted house.

(:

sunday was serving at church and little shop of horrors. it wasnt that bad, really. i sat behind irene ang! hurr.

ahh, im sleepy (: thank God its over. the whole o level study everyday thing isnt easy. but thank God cos He helped me learn to enjoy many things, even studying. He showed me how much He loves me and is willing to help me, despite and inspite of me. He poured His ever abundant grace into my life, it never runs out. because He loves me, i can do anything. because i am crowned with His divine favour, i am invincible. because He remembers my sins no more, i can freely live as a child of God. my Abba loves me, and i can dance and sing with joy in His presence (:

Jesus loves you, sweet dreams.

2006-10-07T01:52:00.000+08:00

You are my God
every moment that i live
Your mighty hand is doing wonders
FOR ME

God is so good and so faithful. what more can i say.

2006-09-30T18:53:00.000+08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qk3FAyXcC40&mode=related&search =

2006-09-30T16:34:00.000+08:00

in Your presence
in Your presence
THERE IS JOY

:] there is power in God's love, and power in His death that gives an abundant and eternal life. a life He wants us to enjoy. Jesus' death gave us the right to call God "ABBA Father". i think thats the greatest thing of all, knowing that it is God's heart for us to be close to Him (: thank God for new creation and ps prince. i am so satisfied! bible study was rocking good. so refreshing and made me feel so loved.
i realised this morning that there are people in this world who can love you and make sacrifices for you, even die for you. they are willing and unselfish. but why can't they be compared with Jesus and what He has done? Jesus' sacrifice and love for us has the power to give us an abundant life. He was condemned on the cross so we'll never be condemned again. He died FOR ME. FOR ME to have all that i have now. there is power in HiS sacrifice! what man can do is really SO limited. Jesus Christ is UNLIMITED :]
rmb pastor once said that God is love. if you think that He stops loving you because you fail Him, you're saying that He's not God. He cannot but love. He cant stop being God. its like how a tree cannot stop being a tree. hurr, i love trees(:
rivers of living water flowing inside me! haha i love that. i love it when im reminded of the simple truths that are so powerful. God really loves me man, and there's nothing you can do about it. hahaha, i feel as though im wearing a sign which says "God's beloved" and it makes me invincible. impossible is nothing for the CHILD OF THE MOST HIGH(: i told you im superman.
i like seeing people get saved. it gives me a sense of joy and im just so touched! (esp when they're like, in the senior citizens age range) :] i want to be a humble and joyful child of God forever. even when im 100, i still wanna be His CHILD. yay that'll keep me forever young.
HAHA. my Abba loves me. despite all my silly weaknesses and all the times i fail Him. and that makes me love Him more. He always has His special way of filling me up with joy. last night really caught me by surprise. i was so reluctant to go but something in me just kept urging me to GOGO(kuzco). YAY
yesterday in the darkness, i wasn't alone! i had my Jesus holding my hand and protecting me. lol(: i love boasting about the goodness of my Jesus. He kept me safe from the stranger(who kept smiling and making the kissing sound?) -EW.

lalala, sing a song if it makes you happy :] i have typed myself happy so i will go do some chem.

its so amazing, how God raised you up (: people can tell, you know? cool.

He uses the weak to confound the mighty.

I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU.
clarissa lim i love you. cant wait for my "i am a tree" skin custom made by my famed blog designer friend (haha i know you're smiling to yourself now) who only creates flawless and awesome skins to save the world.

kathleen ong i love you. you're such a blessing you know. yes, you know cos i told you.thanks for braving the darkness with me.

deirdre nah i love you. you're such a hamburger face. "the cyber world is the best place to be in the universe." technology is actually killing us even as i type this. lol

the bunch i love you. -thesevenofus- is a cute name and i love the company and silly jokes(:

batchies i love you. you all are such great people to grow up with. haha see how we've grown and changed. (i bet none of you will see this but whatever!)

Abba Father i love You. You loved me first and You never stopped loving me. thank You for all the lovelies You've blessed me with. thank You for unveiling my eyes to see the beauty in this world and in myself. i am blessed to be a blessing and beautiful in Your eyes. that's all that matters.

HEE :D i am a tree

2006-09-22T11:36:00.000+08:00

ONE prelim, THIRTY xiao long baos, FOUR fried mars bars, cheesy hotdog, john tucker must die, ugly neoprints, cute photos and 1 litre of ice mountain drinking water away, HERE I AM (:

shit, i have to go meet clarissa lim NOW =/ i need a bath.

2006-09-16T01:23:00.000+08:00

above : an ugly candid shot of yuxuan

HAHAHA, whats with me posting uglyshitshots of myself (: well, shows that im secure

GOD BLESS YOU ALL

2006-09-15T01:23:00.000+08:00

I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH <3
you are such a precious friend and i want us to be besties till the day we're old and wrinkled. of course, "friendship is a ship that never sinks" for us cos we'll still meet in heaven. eternal life = eternal friends! you know, there was a period of time i thought you changed alot and you didnt like me anymore(lol) i know its not true, i know you're still the same girl i went jogging with in ugly clothes in p6. the same girl who loves me for who i am(: i need to tell you that i cannot do without you! i really treasure all the precious moments we've shared. you taught me many things and also brought me closer to God. i love how i can tell you abt everything and our msn conversations :] yeah, all the planetshakers concerts! you were with me for many of the "first time" i did things(: like jumping and that time at cornerstone. i want you to know that you're special and can't be replaced. its funny, how we're so different yet the best of friends. [for one, you're independent and im SO not.] (: heheh. i think being in diff schools made us love each other more. LOL
ps : i am not homosexual
(ha, i like that line)

Go in peace, for we have sworn friendship with each other in the name of the LORD, saying, 'The LORD is witness between you and me, and between your descendants and my descendants forever.'
1 Samuel 20:42

ps: you shld know that i dont like to be the only one awake at home at 1.30 a.m.
see, you're lucky that im staying up to do this for you :)

i love because He first loved me.

2006-09-14T23:17:00.000+08:00

YOU'RE MORE THAN ENOUGH FOR ME

i cant describe how nice i feel [even though my eyes are hurting and i just farted!] God is a God of abundance, He doesnt just give, He OVER gives. now i think im beginning to understand what it means to rely completely and surrender to Him. indeed, it is through exams that we see God's grace super abound.it is during those times that i knew my efforts just werent good enough, when i realised that others were studying more, practising more that i desperately cried out to Him. God is faithful. it is through times where i wasnt prepared at all that i saw His love for me despite my incompleteness. It's like, even if i didnt do as much as others I still know that God loves me and WANTS to bless me. woah, His grace is so powerful yknow. He blessed me with wisdom and FAVOUR! even when i only knew 1 out of 10 chapts of history. see, its not about what you can't do or what you havent done, its always about JESUS! (: hallelujah.

i feel. loved (: looking back, my days are becoming brighter and brighter. thats what God wants for me(and you!), He wants to prosper me, He wants me to enjoy, He wants me to be happy. thats His heart. His heart filled with love for me ! :]

me&kat

phoee
i love you phoebe lim, i really do.

backstreet boyz (HAHAHA)_

2006-09-04T00:10:00.000+08:00

everything begins with a small step of faith. step out of your comfort zone and dare to TRY, you never know where God will lead you. if He brings you to something, He will definitely bring you through it. you will walk in glory and emerge victorious, enjoying every moment of it (:
dont wait for a miracle, look around you and you can see miracles. the person in the mirror, the person on the phone, the person next to you, is a miracle! ah, feel so thankful and tremendously blessed today. looking at how far He has already brought me, surely He will bring me further and further and FURRTHERR! each day will be brighter and brighter and brighter for the righteous one! all of us precious ones in Christ are righteous, not by our own works but by Jesus' sacrifice. OOOH HALLELUJAH (: i am a miracle

would you believe me if i said, you are a miracle?

ps mark = annointed man of God = simple but powerful truths

knowing who you are in Christ is really important.
who am i ?
-righteousness of God in Christ
-greatly blessed, highly favoured, deeply loved child of the Most High
-unique and precious temple of God
-instrument of praise
-overcomer
-receiver of unconditional love that is not based on my own works
-was lost but now found SHEEP. mehhmehh.

gdnite, shalom to all (:

2006-08-05T02:02:00.000+08:00

some of the people i love <3>

BYE (totally unglam llama face)

2006-08-05T00:56:00.000+08:00

HI beloveds, i watched weebl and bob (: they never fail to make me smile!
prelims are like, round the corner. i guess thts why i've been feeling weird lately, my mood going up and down[ like many cosine graphs joined together...lol] and i found out that : the more guilty i felt, the further away i pulled myself from God. Until yesterday, my lovely Jesus spoke to me: " keep your eyes on Me". and kat's walking on waters with God illustration blessed me. yah, and that was when i realised that for the past few days i've not really been talking to God that much, but wallowing in self pity/ guilt/ worry instead? how silly of me. but God is always faithful(: He reminded me that He is the unwavering one, the Prince of Peace. haha His love is so awesome!!
today i came home with a throbbing headache and i nearly puked[some guy on the bus was like the ultimate B.O machine and emitting really strong odours):] (In Jesus' name, i proclaim nice smell upon him) i couldnt study with all my pains so, i randomly went to watch pastor mark's dvd. to be honest, i didnt expect it to really help/touch me cos i watched it many times before. BUT. God is so good and His Word so refreshing. everytime you hear it, you get something new out of it (: Hallelujah! Pastor talked about how God never forsakes me no matter what i do, He always wants to bless me. His blessings pursue me wherever i may go! and then he said that everything good that happened to him, was not because he has great faith or what, but because God is so good. woah that really spoke to me. :] my SAVIOUR.
not worrying about tomorrow, but living for Christ and enjoying each day. my future is out of my control, my tomorrow is in God's hands, not mine, so why should i keep worrying? God created all the beautiful things for me to ENJOY! He wants me to enjoy(:
"to live is Christ, to die is gain" what is there to worry man! hahaha! happy little child of the Most High i am.
after the annointed msg, i immediately went to bathe and prayed in the Spirit for awhile. it felt so gooood. im in His warm embrace ! lol
im still learning and i know God will hold my hand and guide me with every step i take. i wanna keep my eyes oN Jesus cos He's the most beautiful and wonderful. i will not worry, i will trust Him and ENJOY(titus' fav word) . i will give thanks and praise! i will look at the cross, not my circumstances, not my problems.

i just thought of something. God's love is like a million piece jigsaw puzzle. now, what i see is only 1 piece, what i know is only like 1/million of His love and grace. yet i can survive and be so filled with that 1/million. imagine if i can open my eyes and see the whole puzzle. HAHA. who can fathom the depths of Your love? i wanna be blinded by God's light man, im swimming in His oceans of grace(: ahh, feel so satisfied now you know. you getting bored? HA too bad. im happy and refreshed.

go with the flow man.

tonkichi day with kinky

YOU ARE MY COVERING, IN YOU I HAVE EVERYTHING

2006-07-08T20:56:00.000+08:00

does that statement still stand?

i dont think you even notice.

-band fiesta 06
i was looking at fiesta04 photos yesterday and WOW look how we've grown and changed(for the better?) HEHEHEH :D

we love grow

SHOUT TO THE LORD ALL THE EARTH LET US SING.

2006-07-06T23:29:00.001+08:00

SPIRITO 050706

-PRAISE GOD
to me, it was awesome
audrey : said "God is embracing you, He's embracing you!"
batch prayer : asked God for warmth, peace, joy
clarissa : is over the moon, the note came out NICELY!
me : filled with supernatural warmth, calmness and joy never before felt while performing at a concert
enjoyed >(SO MUCH MORE THAN) nervous
thank you : all my lovelies who came
thank you : for the pillow
thank you : (to my admirer) for the 5 pink flowers (: hah
thank you : (to the one who knows me so well) for the red rose with the red balloon
thank you : chocolates and my 21 flowers

after 1st half : "we're so blessed" smiling faces

i dont care what anyone thinks anymore, because the most important part is that i truly immensely enjoyed myself (: [ no more being self conscious, xuan] i feel like hugging someone HEHEHEH.
JOYJOYJOY. i love my batchmates like to the extreme max. they are like the best batchies in the world and i dont know what i'd do without them.
batchies : cry together, laugh together, play together, eat like pigs together, think about food together, sleep together, win together, lose together.....
"we're all in this together" thank you for saying that, because it made a difference.
thank God for bonding us. BATCHIES, YOU ARE SO SPECIAL TO ME.
it feels just like yesterday that we were preparing our seniors farewell boxes at bk. and now, its our turn to bid farewell to band life. I CANT BELIEVE IT. it still hasnt sunken in. i dont want to believe it.
i am proud to be a clarinetist. i am proud that i never gave up. i am proud to be part of tkgssb.

ohman, i love seconds. ex and present seconds. since sec 2 till now (:
all the beautiful memories band has given us.all the experiences that made us stronger and made us who we are today.i'll never forget, even when im old and wrinkled, i'll never forget.

thank You Lord, You were so awesome, thank You for taking over during the concert Lord, thank You for being right beside me. thank You for giving me all these wonderful people.

HEEHEEHEE :D

WHOOO!

2006-07-06T23:29:00.000+08:00

2006-06-30T21:01:00.000+08:00

Lord,

I want to be lost in Your warm embrace again. I want to worship you in this storm. Thank You, Lord, for only in my perfect weakness can Your perfect strength shine through. Daddy, i know the power of your perfect love for me. You are so much bigger than all my problems Lord. I love You

I thank You that despite my circumstances, whether im feeling high or low, whether or not i am conscious of Your presence, You are always always here for me. When i sit still and rest, Lord, i know You are doing all the work for me. And Your work is more perfect than perfect can be. Thank You for loving me, Abba. I know You won't give me more than you know i can bear. You have my future in Your big mighty hands Lord. If You allow anything to happen, its for a reason. And, I know Lord, that You only have good things in store for me.

I will lie on green pastures. I will let you be my shepherd, the Boss of my life. Lord, I am sick and tired of trying and failing, I don't want to rely on my own strengths and keep falling down. I am Yours, Lord. I lift up all my troubles to you. Any weapon formed against me will not prosper because You are for me. Thank You Daddy, for being my strength, my wisdom, my Counsellor, my Provider, Emmanuel. Without You, i have nothing and i AM nothing. Lord, im weak, im last, a loser, but You raise me up to be a champion. Daddy, today i commit everything i am into your hands and i just want to enjoy Your peace and joy in my life. I want to lie in Your arms forever, I know You'll never let me go, You promised never to forsake or leave me...
Thank You Abba, I love You so much.

In Jesus' most beautiful name,
Amen

+ Pour Your Love on me//

2006-06-24T00:47:00.000+08:00

im in love

(:

woah, he's so blessed: left right up down. so filled with the love of God. so much wisdom. so believing.SO COOL LAH.

but too bad he's _________ and (maybe)(a little)too old.
HAHAHA

TEEHEE
oh, and...
i love to sakae with my insect(look alike). the comfortable silence(we were tired), stares into the mirror(reflective surface), her lesbian acts(her way of expressing love i guess) HAHA, laughter and joy. and the 17:4 plates ratio of me and clare in the past. now, im a changed person okay! and SLIM AND BEAUTIFUL in Christ, AMEN!
we had rehearsal at vch that day. with sagging stands.was fun, i like soggy fries.
God's love draws all men to Him (: I LOVE THAT.
heeheehee, theres no need to try being spiritual because i am already a spiritual being! NO NEED TO TRY.

YIPEE! kat my darling is back from the island. yuxuan loves hobbit1&bigbadwolf&&hobbit2 conferences ok? despite you all trying to kill me thru radiation. silly sony ericsson.

excited! like im anticipating something. something good. but i dont know what it is.
oooh, love it. but i cant really go to sleep like that. HEHEH :D
its raining. i love the rain. beautiful sound.

true love waits! i rmb the promise i made(:
i love You. i just love everything this way. You gave me more than i asked and beyond all i ever imagined. i count my blessings! You are such a faithful God(: superabundant in every way. in You, i am a super(wo)man. i can do all things through Christ who strengthens me :D HAHAH feel so loved and in love. yes,i am a lovely girl.

I AM SUPERGIRL AND IMPOSSIBLE IS NOTHING (:

2006-06-16T21:06:00.000+08:00

YO MANZ

we were on a hokkien high after band. clarissa ACT smart only. her stupid counting from 0 to 100 heheh. amusing :D she is like my special(alien) friend who can make me laugh(and cry) at the same time. hoho. 16jun was a good day(: FINALLY man, after what, 2 days of being sad and grumpy. thank GOD for catching me when i was falling =D
i love potong red bean ice cream! cheapo=/
was thinking
relationships are about commitment and time spent together? is that all? i always thought it was about magic/ that special feeling that wld never be lost. is it true : lose old, gain new? everyone becomes a stranger then.
maybe, maybe im not commiting cos i really miss so many people.
something i always thought was so simple. now I dont Understand! ):
i need enlightenment.
oh btw, i have to tell you... that... darlene zschech came to my church last sunday !! (: the thought of it still makes me excited. HEHEHEH she is one blessed lady manz! worship was so powerful and God was moving! (: the Man was in the house!! and He really touched my heart and cleansed my soul. TEEHEE :D i went for two services.it was TOO GOOD. worship is really not just during church/ bible study /concerts man, we can worship from our hearts anywhere and everywhere we go (: its not abt singing in tune or singing the right lyrics, but as long as its from your heart, its a sweet sweet smell to our dear Father. FHOOO!! :D
thank You for leading me to new creation church. i really feel so deeply blessed and highly favoured to be in this church and learning all the stuffs that i've learnt. and knowing God's heart for me, knowing that He only wants and has the best for me. HAHAHA
-Holy laughter- fhoo!
im getting excited (:(:(: yeah!
long time no see photos(:
+ God's creations just for us X) O, the beauty of nature.

+XINYA (whom i miss very very much)IS MINE

+CLARE my darling (nong nong ago) our sim2 days. HAHAHA complete with chilli crab cup noodles

+KAT ong, my favourite sister (esplanade roof top terrace) (:

2006-06-10T02:18:00.000+08:00

I AM BACK.
yea, believe it!
its two in the morning and i cant get to sleep
anw,
today was a wonderrful reunion with bestie which began with a train ride and ended in a cab ride :D
went for JAMX 06 teehee. i liked daniel&band's performance!IM COMING BACK TO THE HEART OF WORSHIP/AND IT'S ALL ABOUT YOU/ALL ABOUT YOU/JESUS/
i miss cai xinya alot now. XMEN3 DATE(:
she's the man is a nice show btw.

i really admire those young people(younger than me!) who are so on fire for God. their faith is just too coooll. they just trust completely in Him, knowing that He'll make a way for them in any situation and are so conscious of His love. ahh, they are so BLESSED. so am i actually(: so HAPPAAAYEEE to see them like that(:

i miss church! cant wait for sunday man! its gonna be waaaaay cool (:
oh and fyi(since i have been mia for SO long), the past few months have been rocking and filled with tremendously blessed days and nights. true, there were surely times of unhappiness, discontent, guilt, but God, He made a way for me. and turned all my mourning into dancing! (: YOOOOHOOO

i love hard gay bytheway. cuttteeeee (:

thank God for, all the LOVELY PEOPLE(: He has put into my life.

SALVATION IS HERE AND HE LIVES IN ME.
i really really really really really dont want to ever ever ever stop worshipping my SAVIOUR/BEST FRIEND/KING!
LOVE YA ALL (:

but the greatest of all is love/
instrument of praise

2005-12-31T23:23:00.000+08:00

they say a picture paints a thousand words
!!nakamura girls- they really inspire me (:
i really learnt so much from sectionals with them. SO IN TUNE. and playing dancing in the wind/if we hold on together, together. yurika is cool! then there was singing WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS on top of the tables with batchies! and waving nonstop at them! fake-sleeping at the sectional area on the dirty floor.
the concert was indeed an experience. i was so nervous and the whole world could see! =/ ah lets not talk abt that.
last night i met up with sihui, audrey, wanyuan and charmaine at the airport. thankGod for siying, we ran to see the supercute nakamura clarinettists for the last time before they checked in. took photos!(not very nice ones.but..)standpartner remembered me!(= whee.
today me and my favourite went to watch kong followed by narnia. dont think both were that nice. and it was my first time at bedok,princess theatre!(cheaper rates :D ) haha so funny the chair was hard and uncomfortable and my favourite was suffering cos there was this super strong FOOTSMELL. gross lah, hongkong feet? haha. we had 60% strawberry pocky.
had intensive BANDing the whole of last week?(plus the previous week?). it was really tiring(but worth it?) enjoy the company of my batchies and section definitely! i finally get to enjoy REST.
all the lessons learnt during band. will strive on! woah i will never forget the concert day, where everything was just so messed up, when i felt all the problems were because of me and i was just feeling so confused, God came in and saved me! i must have repeated the story a thousand times haha. but to everyone reading this, GOD IS SO REAL. He's so real in my life. it's true.i will learn and i will do better.thank God for clara and sihui!
ahh wont be blogging too often. it's getting boring. haha im joining audrey and clarissa(who went on to her stupid trading card shit)

PRAYER WORKS WONDERS! (aud agrees!)
(/edit)

the ugly girl and her pretty standpartner. I MISS HER!

2005-12-13T21:50:00.000+08:00

ng si ting, i love you!

God is so good, He gave me a friend called sharlyn. i think we are telepathic (:

PS: i will NEVER forget simlesbian days (: lol, are you at camp? i called today.

2005-12-09T14:35:00.000+08:00

Believing that true love waits, I make a commitment to God, myself, my family, my friends, my future mate, and my future children to a lifetime of purity including sexual abstinence from this day until the day I enter a biblical marriage relationship."

The Five Commitments of True Love Waits

To God: Matthew 22:37 - "Jesus replied, 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.'"

To Yourself: Matthew 22:39 - "And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"

To Family: Philippians 4:5 - "Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near."

To Friends: John 15:13 - "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends."

To Future Mate and Children: 2 Timothy 2:22 - "Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart."

Do you want to make the True Love Waits pledge?

http://www.lifeway.com/tlw/students/join.asp

(: JOIN

2005-12-03T16:29:00.000+08:00

As the deer panteth for the waters
so my soul longs after You,
You alone are my heart's desire
and i long to worship You.

i am back (: praise God. ok so hongkong wasnt as bad as i thought it to be. the previous times i went there everything was much better though. loved the weather, didnt go to disneyland(very crowded) but we passed by hollywood hotel which looked quite pretty from outside. we met up with auntie nida!(who used to work for us) oh the joy of seeing her again(= not much stuff to buy this time, all winter wear!urgh. but i finally got my watch. HEHE. its quite a plain white swatch, but very pretty. and i dont think we have it in singapore yet :D whee, had nice food everyday. DIMSUM, i like! people in hongkong really know how to enjoy life. we also went to visit jiemin's grandad, cute old man! the fat fat kind. HE IS MY NEW IDOL. see, he's a fabulous cook(he prepared superyummy dinner for us), he owns a house in at least 4 countries, he can build houses, he owns a farm in australia, and he is just too cool (:
anw hk has too many smoking ppl, i dont like. and the second day was rather boring i started msging and calling people =/ oh they have this disneyland souvenior shop at the airport and i got this pooh bracelet. did i mention i hate taking airplanes? i mean i really really dont like the smell of planes and plane food. nearly puked. watched the 40 year old virgin and charlie and the choc factory on the plane. the show was nice even though it was the third time i was watching it (= (reminds me of gourie) the only thing i ate on the plane was strawberry ice cream! oh nicest food on board. and clara was jealous she didnt get ice cream though we both took singapore airlines. haha. oh second person i called when i reached was clara tong! she gets excited over silly stuff which is quite funny. my best partner!
i keep singing that same song everyday. love it (: ah my boring entry. beach day is on monday. my jiejie is leaving on monday. i cant wait for sunday. cant wait to praise God with all my heart again.

if only the people who think they'll get to heaven through what they do would realise that the only way to get to heaven is not by our deeds, but by Christ Jesus. if we could enter heaven by our good deeds then He wouldnt have to die for us. we're ALREADY FORGIVEN. praise Daddy for that (:

GOD'S GRACE HAS SAVED ME

2005-11-20T21:34:00.000+08:00

i dont wanna grow up, be a toys r us kid, there's a million toys at toys r us for me to play with! (:

it's been years since i last blogged (= i am a very happy girl today. thankyouS to KATHO, GOUGOU, PHOEPHOE, JANJAN AND STEPHNUNU. i really love you all to bits man!
it was a nice tea/dinner at katho's house to celebrate phoe and xuan's birthdays. shy/shortxuan is very touched. and kat was very sweet(i love the book!) no thankyous for trying to trick us, my friends, cos WE KNEW IT. okay fine maybe not.but still, great acting x) YEAH you guys really made my day. (ps i know you didnt help in baking the cake and the cookies, kat) HURRHURR, joking ok.
i watched harry potter again last night with my jiejie. SHE SLEPT.SHE SLEPT. anw, harry is getting fat. oh i watched harry that day with wanyuan, audrey, sihui, siying, brina and wanyuan and sihui's friends. wanyuan is a very childish girl.
i think i had quite a few birthday dinners before, after and on my birthday. HEH. yuxuan loves to eat.
and my jiejie made me a card that made me cry.
the best present i got this year was probably knowing that i am loved by so many.
Daddy God has taught me so much this year. yes, im still crazy and on fire for this Almighty God who loves me so X)
oh i went to ikea and bought a pot of plant for FEEB! hee.

they do not always begin well, but in the end, my days are always saved by my ABBA (: im thankful for the Lord, who knocked on my door first.

i keep thinking abt this,
we're all inside a house and there's a door. but there's only one doorknob inside, meaning only we can open that door. Jesus is standing outside, knocking on the door, He wants you to accept Him and invite Him in, because thats the only way He can enter(by your invitation). the more you open the door, the more grace can enter. which means the more you TRUST, the more grace you can feel(you only keep the door wide open when you trust the person outside it right). and now, as Christians, our doors are wide open because we trust in Jesus Christ, we know Him. but some of our neighbours and friends do not, so their doors are shut. all we have to do is CALL them to tell them about the person knocking on their doors and they too, would open up their doors.

hope you get it? heh was talking to my Jesus one night when i thought of this. pardon the lousy english.HEHEH. im a blessed kid lah (=

unconditional
• not subject to any conditions.
not conditional or limited : ABSOLUTE(free from imperfection:perfect), UNQUALIFIED

thats God's love for me, UNCONDITIONAL.
nothing i do more or less can change my God's love for me. it's a parent's love, it needs no reason.
since when did love need a reason?

(: HE LOVES ME SO,

2005-11-10T12:09:00.000+08:00

http://www.theinterviewwithgod.com/popup-frame.html
just know that I am here, always

2005-11-06T21:15:00.000+08:00

Walking in the Spirit +

im so glad i went to church today. i am so grateful to all the people who ever talked to me about Christ in the past. service was ROCKin' and God is so awesome yesterday, today and forever. really really felt the Spirit moving. (God works in ways we cannot see!) i was very touched by the testimonies pastor lian shared. then everyone prayed in tongues and i just started crying. thats like, the first time i ever cried in church. yah and probably the longest time i prayed out loud in the Spirit. well now im really convinced that its a gift my Heavenly Father has given me and no one can tell me otherwise (=
someone once shared that if i were the only person Jesus had to die for, He would still die for ME. He would do it for you too, because we are all precious children of His. no matter how much we do more or do less, it wouldnt change how much our Abba loves us.

ooh yay the truth has set us free. kat is coming back tmr!
practised saigon just now. no, no good.

2005-11-01T21:09:00.000+08:00

a man hung dying in the rain
all because of love.

i love the beach. only spotted one star tonight. it was very bright (: nature reminds me of Jesus. and i kinda miss going to church very much. ohoh, i want my nano and evermore.

its over. so?

God will make a way, when there seems to be no way, He works in ways i cannot see, God will make a way for me. He will be my guide,hold me closely to His side. With love and strength for each new day, He will make a way.
He will make a way

2005-10-23T01:07:00.000+08:00

He took our darkness away so that we can walk in the light.

because You have turned my mourning into dancing (=

thankyouuuuuuuuuuuuuu

2005-10-22T21:48:00.000+08:00

L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one i see
V is very very extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that you adore
and love, it's all that i can give to you
love is more than just a game for two
two in love can make it
take my heart but please don't break it
love was made for me and you

telepathy they call it (: i was thinking alot last night and i was picturing myself and mybestfriend sitting on the sand and me pouring out all my troubles. hahaha. when you have problems you always go to God first amen?

i heard too much bad stuff about nano now i want the video one. shit i sound like some spoilt.person

im supposed to be studying! theres hcl olevels on the 31st.

"How gracious he will be when you cry for help!As soon as he hears, he will answer you." Isaiah 30:19

praise God for precious precious people around and really, everything. He has done sooo much for me .too much for undeserving yuxuan. im really quite bad with words but this God, my Heavenly Father is so AWESOME i just want you to know that. its like sometimes you look at someone and you're thinking how great it would be if he/she were to know Abba..

results are quite okay i guess, thank You Father, i know it could have done muchmuch worse.not good enough lah still.

next year im really going to work hard and i mean it. (ok, please remind me to work hard when you see me hah) i really dont care what you think. yes, behold.

just a face in the crowd to you ?

too much stuff have been going on )=

my daily bread just arrived, God always finds a way to let you hear Him. ahh i love HIM SO MUCH.and my clare has just come online. good things come together? haha. the joy of my Lord will be my strength.

i know.

2005-10-15T23:40:00.000+08:00

i sing praises to Your name

i just got home (: heehee i want to get married TO A pastor. i will have 100 tables of guests and i want a red evening gown. i also want sharlyn ng as my bridesmaid and she must make a little speech that'll make me cry.
i think im a little tipsy hahaha, attended the wedding of a distant distant very distant relative at mandarin hotel. the couple looked so happy together heheh. groom looked strangely like -someone :/ the whole place was just filled with old old people i dont know and i kept getting hugged by weird "uncles" eee scary. i finished my glass of red wine ok! feel so.. accomplished. new discovery: mushroom is nicer than abalone and sea cucumber more than fish yay. EH there must be some smokeything when i appear! that'll be nice (: haha so exciting. i cant get to sleep like that.
before that i was at ahma's house all afternoon, bonding? heh watched the choir!(les...chori..smth..tes) mr i-sing-like-a-girl is cute! i love him. watched phantom of the opera again, and some vcd on eucharist miracles. like the holy communion bread becoming blood halfway during service. smth like that. what we're taking every sunday is truly Jesus' blood and body.

oh and yesterday, i woke up the earliest! went with janice and kat-uterus-hleen to tm. haha uterus went to goldheart to have her ears pierced heheh she was so funny! and cute lah. then we headed for tj openhouse. i hope we werent the only sec threes there. oh and the best part was us going to the audi to watch the dance performance but ended up listening to the principal talk. hee then i cabbed down to meet shar at suntec for biblestudy! oh so cool listening to the Word of our dearest Abba. His grace and love for us.
"take joy my King, in what You hear, let it be a sweet sweet sound, in Your ears...." really felt the presence of Abba in that place man! one day shar and i are going to the beach to praise ! yesyesyes.

dearest shar,
SMILE DEARIE! i know i cant take away whatevers bothering you/making you feel the way you do now but i just want you to know that i'm always here for you(cliche but i mean it!), i love you and you are in my prayers ! (: i know Daddy will put that smile back on your face again then you can be my pretty bridesmaid! hahaha

Let not your hearts be troubled, do not be afraid.
thank God for all the miracles He's performed in my life. all praises and honour to Him! yes Jesus rules and i wont stop talking about His great love for me!

O MY SOUL REJOICE

2005-10-12T11:52:00.000+08:00

i am awake (= what a beautiful day
ha, actually i was like awake at around 10 maybe. love to wake up naturally(haha sounds funny). wrapped under my FAVOURITE blanket reading Heaven Is Real and then singing random songs of praise to the King and knowing how truely blessed i am. its indeed a beautiful day and im glad i didnt wake up at 2 plus as expected! thankyou Abba for all You've done. and the book is a blessing everyone should go and read it. Heaven is real by Choo Thomas. our Father has already prepared mansions in Heaven for those who love and obey Him with our names written in gold on the front door. andand do you know the streets of Heaven are made of gold? why are we still going after worldly possessions and wealth.
" So that you will fully understand that no matter how good people are, they will go to hell if they do not accept Me. I love every one of My children, but I cannot force anyone to love Me or to obey me. If they will open up their hearts to Me, then I can help them to believe in Me and love Me. "

that really struck me hard.
and made me sad. i will not give up. i will tell the world.

' I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me" John 14:6

went bonding with phoee and katho yesterday (: bumped into too many people hahaha.

The Lord is truly coming soon/

heyhey : batchies time!

2005-10-10T17:19:00.000+08:00

My Saviour, Redeemer,
lifted me from the miry clay.
Almighty forever,
I will never be the same again
cause You came down,
from the everlasting,
to the world we live,
the Father's only Son.
You lived, You died,
You rose again on high.
You opened the way for the world to live again.
Hallelujah, FOR ALL YOU'VE DONE./

i want to tell the world. it's like, knowing about someone so good and not to share is being selfish.you know? was just really scared after reading about the terrorists and earthquakes and all, im not afraid of dying, but i really dont want to see people i love being left behind when the rest of us are all in Heaven. by then i would definitely regret not telling them about Christ. i thank God for the great company He's blessed me with, for such a comfortable life, for being so close to me all this while, for new creation church and wonderful pastors, for a wonderful family, for everything in my life! okay my life is from Him too (= hee.
we learnt about thanksgiving yesterday. praise God for kathleen man, WE OVERSLEPT, but we still made it! i should stop complaining about what i dont have and start thanking God for what He has given me.
this years finals has been especially special to me, maybe its the first time in my life i really tried hard for exams but that led to me stressing out too much and breaking down (?) yeah the effects of trying too hard hurrhurr. but yeah, He was there, He saw me through, He carried me. i realised that the "footprints in the sand" story would always always be the first thing i think of when i feel low. He is always there (:

shit i think i am eating too much. all the weight i've lost will be gained back soon. nono dont want. but i still want to go to kuishinbo! i know the song best.
DONGDONGDONG 123, SUNTEC TOWER ONE LEVEL THREE, DONGDONGDONG 123, WE ARE, KUISHINBO.
and i want to go to seoul garden haha with my beatrice and rach and blackie and xinya and dee and mingfang and isabelle and mushroom and feRR-Y. who else?

2005-10-07T23:12:00.000+08:00

Jesus' blood never fails me

im craving for more of You, Lord.
i want to tell the world about Jesus, yes you!(dont look around) i want to tell you.

2005-10-07T20:44:00.000+08:00

God has brought me this far. Yes, and yuxuan is still alive.
never felt so stressed up over exams IN MY LIFE. and then the pimples start popping up.
i miss church so much. why do i feel so dry now.
but im still glad that God has carried me all the way (: its like, He has blessed me with so many miracles. and when i fall, HE PICKED ME UP. we're all growing. He really lifted me up.

i miss my 2/1 shitties i want my seoul garden(and no bea we're not sharing party!haha) i miss my batchmates(ok fine i bet they dont miss me) i miss my sharlyn (shes thinking of me)

YOU;RE SO AWESOME IN THIS PLACE. YOU ROCK YOU SO ROCK

2005-09-24T01:24:00.000+08:00

HOW DEEP IS YOUR LOVE?
> deeper than the seas
> higher than the heavens
>that You died for me.

it's true you're my superman.

MUG ON! :D

because through Christ, I CAN.

2005-09-17T23:42:00.000+08:00

champaign chocolate mooncake! ooh the richness. i am getting drunk i can taste the wine :D

oh happy day! double yum.

i have to wake up at 6. i blogged so many times today!

LET GO AND LET GOD.

2005-09-17T23:15:00.000+08:00

why is everyone watching full house?

2005-09-17T22:18:00.000+08:00

The Lord is my Shepherd. I shall not flunk;
He keepth me from lying down when i should be studying.
He leadeth me beside the water cooler for a study break;
He restoreth my faith in study guides.
He leads me to better study habits for my grade's sake.
Yea, though i walk through the valley of borderline grades,
I will not have a nervous breakdown;
For Thou art with me.
My prayers and my friends, they comfort me.
Thou givest me answers in moments of blankness;
Thou anointest my head with understanding.
My exam paper runneth over with questions i recognize.
Surely passing grades and flying colors shall follow me
All the days of my examinations,
And i shall not have to dwell in this university forever,
Amen.

i r mugger!

THE LORD HAS BEEN GOOD TO ME (: was tossing and turning in bed last night. worrying about eoys? weird yuxuan. it's the first time, first time i feel i really want to do well. luckily after praying, everything got better and i felt so calm and peaceful! haha(: now im assured that if i work hard on my part, and leave the rest to God, all will be fine. yay/ let go and let God, really.
He has been working in my life. He has made me whole in His perfect LOVE .
havent been online the whole week! i have been well and studying (: though quite alot of chapters unstudied(?). i can do it! the Lord is my strength and song.

had a really really sweet dream last night (: oh, i went to see doctor kong this morning. i will be healed, by Jesus' stripes. cough plus flu ohno.

United Malay National Organisation, Malayan Chinese Association, Malayan Indian Congress came together to form the Alliance Party! SEE I KNOW .

i will follow You, all of my days, i will praise

2005-09-11T20:26:00.000+08:00

i am/ going to miss band

i will/ study hard for eoys
i will/ do well for eoys
i will/ not be seen online
i will/ practise (the clarinet)consistently
i will not/ stop practising (the clarinet)
i will/ study very hard

i am/ child of God, precious and loved (:

you will/ miss me.

2005-09-08T00:51:00.000+08:00

FiShBaLlZ is NOT YOUR FRIEND.

fahdfjhdasruearhjdsajdsah

argh! soh wanyuan

2005-09-07T22:20:00.000+08:00

the joy of the Lord is yuxuan's strength

and that's what kept me going today (: i cant imagine a day without God, i never ever want to forget that He is always always there for me, no matter what. so happy to see people growing in Christ, fervently reaching for Him, enjoying His presence and love. oohyay. band was not too bad today. but we still have alot to work on, not much time left also. wanyuan just reminded friday is last practice. time to buckup.passion for music. something that can be felt.yes (= they got future hahaha. that blacksmith song! everytime i come home from band i will like faint on the sofa immediately or something. superrrr no energy how to study like that!?/ booooo i have not been studying asdsahjgwqh
STALKER IN RED , roses in red, buses in red
thank God for wanyuan, really. that white face red nose one (=
praise God for batchies, they are my strength and support.

Your grace has found me just as I am, Empty-handed but alive in your hands.

forever i am changed by Your love, forgiven so that i can forgive.
MAJESTY, MAJESTY

2005-09-04T21:10:00.000+08:00

God is bigger than the air i breathe, the world we'll leave. God will save the day and all will say, my glorious ++

(: (MY GLORIOUS x9) whoo im in love with that song. everyone go to FEEBEE's ! we all know how BIG our God is and how He always wants the best for us. yet we always want to do things our own way, forgetting that He knows so much more than us. we often ask God to bless us with this and that, instead of asking Him for what He thinks is best for us. how would we know whats the best? He knows, He's our Creator! "let go and let God" simple phrase that means so much and that so many fail to achieve.
ohyay im smiling and singing that song over and over again. maybe nextnext monday i will still be singing that song, deedeetengcheong join me!

im gonna miss my darlings. ONE WEEK ONE WEEK ? ):
church! thankYouJesus for kathleenongxinwei (: God gives us ACCORDING to His riches. not a small part, not a little bit, not 90%, but 100%! i have been thinking about that since last week.heh my God is such a generous and forgiving God. i cannot keep to all the ten laws, no one can. but i believe in Jesus Christ and that He has forgiven all my sins, He will guide me in doing what is right. and when i fall, He will pick me up, give me strength, and never stop walking with me (:
happyhappy kat and i were talking so much today. met new people and as usual. antisocial. haha SHY LA, SHY.

i am missing clarissa lim and i really hope she doesnt see this haha she will laugh at me. we're forever quarelling and scolding each other for being slow. but now she's gone, i miss her silly antics. haha ohman i sound like she died or something. in case you didnt know, grasshopper-lookalike is at jakarta now.like, NOW. choosing maids for me.

SMARTIES

2005-09-03T22:17:00.000+08:00

audrey, clarissa and i just got back from some country and we were at the airport. we put our luggage on some blue bus and then went down to walk around. later, we found out that the bus had left without us! so we were walking towards some taxi stand. then, we spotted this toilet and someone had to pee so we went in. woah the toilet was like some posh hotel toilet, so pretty! then suddenly,
clarissa went " mummy!"
audrey and i turned, clare's mum was taking a bath in the toilet! and the door was not properly shut(nono we didnt see anything we shouldnt have seen). it was just a small gap left there and water was splashing out. yuxuan was wet! then i looked at audrey, she was COVERED WITH SOAP! haha hilarious sight. audrey was pissed and i was kinda angry so we stormed out of the toilet. and clarissa was left in the toilet with mummy

END (:
thats my dream for you. been having weird dreams lately. eh, i told my batchies about my dreams(including this one!) this morning.hahaha. silly goose. the rest are private =/
band was hothothot and sweaty/ my lousy tone. i am craving for grapes. a big bowl of grapes!(like the ones we had at kat's place)
]BAR 147, 135 oo
Lord Father, guide me.i need You. woah i really need clara tong on saturdays. +Jesus is my strength and song

ZONDA 3.5

i wish we were still as enthu abt stuff. like them/look at them
i miss the times !

His love endures forever! (:
/because i cant stop praising Jesus' name
/because He loves me even before i love Him
/because His love for me is deeper than the sea

come on come on, we'll tell the world abt YOU! (:

2005-09-01T23:06:00.000+08:00

Yet when i surveyed all that my hands had done and what i had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind
Ecclesiastes 2:11

hold me in your arms again
had a weird dream this afternoon. ~~nightmare~~ afternoonmare ): silly thoughts, silly thoughts, go away./
i keep thinking of James 1:2-3. PURE JOY/TRIAL/PERSEVERANCE?yeah
sometimes you know that what you're doing is not right. yet, you cant help but go on doing it? whaaat i dont make sense lah. taonan was rather boring. BUT i got to see my FAVOURITE you dont know who LOL!he is like such a cute old man. ooh so happy so happy. natalie sun is such a retard i love her! that dried bamboo stick made me laugh like crazy. virnice darling is ever so sweet, always on yuxuans side. and shar, i love shar for being shar. love chicken, and water too, for being the chicken and water they are. oh crap. mrs tay loves me, not natalie that chicken backside.

i miss yuping blackie!mochaie. i want to go to her house and visit yu an my favourite person.
went to clares in the afternoon with audrey and wanyuan (= i love them, i love batchies, really i do. and the whole audrey incident today just shows how God can always make the impossible POSSIBLE (: im His princess, His favourite child. so are you.
the more i trust Jesus, the more miracles i see each day! haha my God is so good. and He just gets better and better!

never let me go

2005-08-30T22:21:00.000+08:00

"Jesus' love does not depend upon what we do for Him. Not at all. In the eyes of the King, you have value simply because you are. you dont have to look nice or perform well. Your value's inborn...think about it. you are valuable just beacuse you exsit...the next time someone tries to pass you off as a cheap buy, just think about the way Jesus honours you...and smile. I do. I smile becasue i know i dont deserve love like that. none of us do... all of us are signing on Jesus' credit card, not ours. And it also makes me smile to know that there is an ex-con walking the golden streets who knows more about grace than a thousand theologians. No one else would have given him a prayer. But in the end, that is all that he had. and in the end, that is all that it took.
No wonder they call Him the Saviour."

-Max Lucado's 'No wonder they call Him the Saviour'

hee =D i got this from phoeee's. i am smiling (: today was miracle day! haha, very happy. band roomed with clara, peckhong, audrey, wanyuan, charmaine, clarissa and sihui to pack the cupboards oh whee. so neat now, so neat.

audrey : SMILE! because you are God's precious princess and He loves you so so much. (so do your batchmates!) take it as a lesson learnt ok and im sure you'll get over it very soon. okay im like really bad at consoling people. (hey wait, we dont like people to console us!) haha audrey, haha. I HAVE THIEVING MAGPIES! play together one day! TWENTY FIVE FATTISH COUNTS (:

i am going to see my darlings tomorrow. haha no no not a loser X/

2005-08-29T22:15:00.000+08:00

" first we were eating, then we were eating. after after that. we were still eating. clare was just trying to feed us until we were like fat pigs. clarissa is accountable for the pounds we gained "
- audrey's

just to give you a rough idea of what we were doing, SATURDAY

2005-08-29T21:43:00.000+08:00

H. A. Ironside, in his commentary on Ephesians, tells of a visit he had with an old, dying man named Andrew Fraser. Dr. Ironside writes,

He could barely speak above a whisper, for his lungs were almost gone, but I can recall yet how, after a few words of introduction, he said to me, "Young man, you are trying to preach Christ; are you not?" I replied, "Yes, I am," "Well," he whispered, "sit down a little, and let us talk together about the Word of God." He opened his well-worn Bible, and until his strength was gone, simply, sweetly, and earnestly he opened up truth after truth as he turned from one passage to another, in a way that my own spirit had never entered into them. Before I realized it, tears were running down my face, and I asked, "Where did you get these things? Could you tell me where I could find a book that would open them to me? Did you learn these things is some seminary or college?" I shall never forget his answer. "My dear young man, I learned these things on my knees on the mud floor of a little sod cottage in the north of Ireland. There with my open Bible before me, I used to kneel for hours at a time, and ask the Spirit of God to reveal Christ to my soul and to open the Word to my heart, and He taught me more on my knees on that mud floor that I ever could have learned in all the seminaries or colleges in the world" (In the Heavenlies, 86-87).

i want to tell you about sunday. yuxuan went for TWO SERVICES in a row! yay and happiness was all around. first service with kat, second service with stef. then she went for the spook show05 with phoe and stef, it was quite interesting. oh, i learnt about FEAR. hee :D

everything has been great and i can see God working in my life, blessing me so abundantly, i am OVERFLOWING with His grace (:

woah seriously, He helped me overcome my initial fears about this whole thing. and now i know i will be able to do my job well with His guidance. thank God also, for clara tong, my best partner! (=

RESPECT

i want to know You, i want to see Your face, i want to know You more, MORE AND MORE! (:
only through You, Lord.

2005-08-26T21:51:00.000+08:00

this is a song, a song about pie. hope i get some before i die (:

WEEBL AND BOB, ever so entertaining! never fails to make me smile.
3/9 won!woah all that cheering today was so fun! X) im loving my class more and more each day.
" shampoo, we like! we're gonna wash our hair tonight. lather, and rinse!" OOOHYES ,YES ,YES.
(: so happy. though im like, dead tired! i got wind, i need a massage. all for love all for love, You gave.
the closer you live to God, the smaller everything else gets. thankyou clare for sharing that with me!

clarissaCLSG dear, i love you so much man!you are someone im so comfortable with, and i can be myself around (: great to see you growing so much in Christ each day! never stop believing ok!

woah our God is really an amazing God. the more i know Him, the more i learn about Him, the more i love Him. He has blessed me ABUNDANTLY.

ask, and you shall receive.

DO YOU BELIEVE?

2005-08-21T21:38:00.000+08:00

im coming back to the heart of worship.
and its all about You, all about You,
Jesus

(:

i see i see. boo, you aren't from there. i must tell audrey and sihui and all. i was happy for nothing.

STUDY GROUP (=

I JUST WANNA LIVE

2005-08-20T22:11:00.000+08:00

willy wonka, willy wonka!
haha, that SOOO reminds me of gourie man!
sings : how to be a tigger is up to you +++ (=

band practise this morning was not too good for me. just shows how important consistent practise is. yeah, but nevermind its never too late to HOLD LONG NOTES everyday and be cool (: i must! God will guide me and carry me through this! then, when we achieve our 25 counts, audrey and i will play THIEVING MAGPIE together! our celebration piece oh yippeee! WE CAN DO IT (:
ok, so after band : OUR FAVOURITE WANTON NOODLES at the coffeeshop with jiayi and audrey! (: then, me and audrey proceeded to esplanade library! ohmy that place rockZZZZZZZ! but made us feel dizzy. we got our audreyuxuan pretty cashcard! they have like cute scores and cds there, i like! stayed there for quite some time, walked to citylink, had MRS FIELD'S BROWNIE AND MUFFIN (: oh-so-heavenly, we both agree! and and, we were eating with our hands, so dirty! banana marble (= took an ancient shuttle to millenia walk ooh!such a cool shuttle with a cool driver. we ran to CANDY EMPIRE! where yuxuan splurged on chocolates! ok not really la. i bought 5 lucky wonka bars for my darlings. i want nougats man audrey said she'll buy for me (: yay bought some weird purple stick thing and BEEF STICK ohmyohmy. we thought ugly food = yummy food.
and " if you dont try this, you dont know jack" we wanted to know jack.NOW WE KNOW JACK! haha jack is a dog! (ok i think only audrey knows what im talking about)
so we each took a bite and concluded that it was dog food :X GROSS. WE KNOW JACK. beefsticks are disgusting
EWW. haha took SHUTTLE back and trained+bused home (: with clarissa entertaining me on my bus ride. haha thanks clare! for reading out the shit for me X) dont ask why. came home and held long notes! felt good.

i thank God for today, everyday actually. praise God for my beloved batchies! whom i love so much (: and my church buddies and my XINYA! and stef lah, for listening to me!(ps : i bought wonka bar for you stef!) haha greedy pig. MY GOD IS AN AWESOME GOD, in Him all things are possible.

THE CLOSER YOU LIVE TO GOD, THE SMALLER EVERYTHING ELSE APPEARS.

i live for You alone.
i am the disciple whom God loves! (: ohman, i love Him so.

2005-08-19T22:04:00.000+08:00

He has, delivered me from all fears,
He has, set my feet upon the rock.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR! (: you are the best and i love you. thank you for making my day and i hope i made yours too X) [ i can see you laughing as you're reading this! ]
oh and ferena and clare rocks too huh?chicken, green soup, cockles, yellow noodles!

time to say goodbye! time to let go! time to go MADNESS and SMILEY (rocks!) its over!

i cant wait for sunday you know.

(time and again)

His love endures FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER.

2005-08-14T21:32:00.000+08:00

all for love's sake became poor

MUGGER

2005-08-13T22:37:00.000+08:00

Rain down, all around the world we're singing
Rain down, can you hear the Earth is singing
Rain down, my heart is dry but still i'm singing
Rain down, rain it down on me

THERE IS NOTHING MY GOD CANNOT DO /
transformed! been receiving abundant blessings from God and i love Him so.be thankful for all He has given me, and i should stop complaining about what i dont have or what im lousy at, but instead praise Him for all that He's blessed me with (: im learning new things, everyday. "and even though sometimes Your Ways i cannot understand, i'll never walk away because my future's in Your hands!" all the things i've learnt, i want to put to action(speaks louder than words haha) yeah i know its gonna be hard. let go and LET GOD!
i've got lots on my mind now but haha its so difficult to put everything down to words. [yuxuan cant express herself because her english is lousy] its ok, God knows! (:
flag day today! we love toa payoh and bedok residents they rock our socks (= old men, fathers, mothers, little children(!!!!!), females in 20s, guys our age, old women, are the best. i kind of agree with what the headmaster in the english teacher said, about children! (: haha yay so blessed so blessed.

GOD IS LOVE

where is your heart, what i really want is to believe you
i want you back

2005-08-12T23:16:00.000+08:00

carnival at marina! woah if only i could post all the hundred photos kathleen just sent me! (: looking at those make me happy.
conclusions : /we love candid shots/ /kat is horny/ /ice kachang is the best/ /yummy yoghurt/ /phoebe can pose/ /naqiah is mad/ /caryl is short/ /xuan is a jumping-vampire-ghost-shit/ /katxuan loves to jump/

bad face day! hahaha, i very very very much want to post ALL the photos.they make me so excited (= haha i love jumping photos even when they make me look me like a vampire!
WOOHOOOOOOOO! (X

YOU ARE MAGNIFICENT! JESUS TAKE ME NOW I AM YOURS!

(:

2005-08-11T22:45:00.000+08:00

because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance
James 1:3
I WANT TO KNOW YOU, I WANT TO HEAR YOUR VOICE.
PURE JOY! seeing more and more people accepting Christ in their lives and enjoying Him! praiseGod (= i remember me and phoebe talking about how nice it would be if the entire school population were children of God. when we were jumping to the national day songs i think. hahaha. going for the carnival thing at marina tmr! hee naqiah just msged me, reminding me to PWH. but im not really doing it. AHH, SO SLACK. and i miss kat and clare.katclare.
oh, kat i finally finished half blood prince.im the tsewols person in the world i know.felt so sad when i read the "snipe killed dumbledoo"part. haha AUDREY I MISS AUDREY AND MY BATCHIES.
somehow im missing band practise because no band practise equals seeing less of batchmates, and i need band practise also. cannot slack ! ahh i need sihui to remind me haha.

bestfriend i miss you the most and i love your layout ! ALL FOR LOVE! i was listening to that yay (: saturday saturday.

God does not tempt, it is our own desires that tempts.

IM LOVED (=

2005-08-09T22:40:00.000+08:00

Not well-traveled, not well-read
Not well-to-do, or well-bred
I just want to hear instead
Well done, good and faithful one

i am feeling lousy ): i miss you ,you always know how to make me smile.
ahh, i know my Healer will heal me..
" you are special and loved,always rmb that " xinya rocks. i shall write "im loved" down on a piece of paper a hundred times and maybe i'll feel much much better.
yes Lord, all i need is You. i want to praise and worship and never stop praising and worshipping everyday. i dont ever want to lose this passion for Jesus.
so i watched charlie and the chocolate factory again at great world with my darling hweeli and weekiat at 00:20 this morning. that's the first thing i did on national day(oh happy national day by the way) i confess i was sleeping almost the WHOLE TIME and the show seemed so long and draggy! my legs were frozen like err, as frozen as frozen trotters ): woah last night was really weird man, sitting there and being the antisocial monster that i am. but morning was much better praise the Lord! we spent like 100bucks in the arcade and we still couldnt win that guitar, how dumb. took lots of neoprints and sketches, its been ages since i took a neoprint! then we bballed, played by the pool and baked. spending quality time together, haha.
boo boring entry. nat day celebrations at school was cool cos we were jumping and going crazy to the lousy songs. and i got to spend time with my BELOVED batchies after that, yes we go through thick and thin . all the good and BAD TIMES we suffer together (= 4 dollar swensens sundaes, closed down arcades, squeezy cab rides, long queues, han's lunch, tired tired tired long hikes, library talks. ohman, i love you all so much.

THERE IS NOTHING LIKE YOUR LOVE

you know who(haha) : i love you! because you are always there, always there. and your words always ring in my ears! haha/ you are my sunshine yay. too bad i look retarded in the photo or it'll be here. ps: dont use that email people will laugh at you.

2005-08-05T21:15:00.001+08:00

ohno i didnt give up my seat to someone who needs it more than i do! =/
hee (: praise God, God is love! HOW COULD I LIVE WITHOUT YOU?
i want to go for fop so badly. but everyone's busy and so am i.going for uncle's birthday thingthing tomorrow (= yay sunday please come quicK!shar!
i am SO BLESSED. hee, i walked all the way home from parkway alone. you know it actually feels good, to be alone once in a while, but knowing God is walking with you. then enjoying nature! hahaha, i love trees and the sun and the sky.
this reminds me of this monday/tuesday(?)when i went to the beach with clarissa.we sat on the sand and talked about everything, about God! and she shared her innermost secrets! hahaha, sorry i cant get over that.yeah and we were looking at the sky, it was so beautiful! God's creations! i want to beach with you again clare!(:

I AM : the disciple whom God loves (=

i cant wait for sunday man (: i love my clare and my caryl and my kat and my phoee and my naqiah and my dee (OH DEE PLEASE SMILE OK, DONT SMILE NOT PRETTY ALR!)and my shittie and my XINYA and my DARLING BATCHMATES
i cannot survive school without all these wonderful people by my side !(:
heh bio was so fun ! i counted 326 bubbles from the cabomba plant! yes, i rock.

HEAR THE ANGELS SING ++

2005-08-05T20:31:00.000+08:00

How could I live without You
How could I survive
Without Your love
Without Your touch
You're the One that heals me
And cleanses my heart
And sets me free
Now i come right before You
With my hands lifted up
With my heart humbly bowed
At Your work on the cross
As You hang there and die
You were paying the price
For my life, For my life
For Your love is higher than the heavens
Deeper than the seas
And all I want is You in my life
Noone else can satisfy my soul
Can make me feel this way
Only You Lord, only You

Lord, only YOU (= i love You

2005-08-04T22:14:00.000+08:00

I'll never give up my family for anything, not even all the chocolate in the world
CHARLIE! (:

ooh whee! I FEEL GOOD! praise the Lord for through Him all things are possible. today was an amazing day filled with blessings. and i know why! cos i surrendered all my worries and fears to the Lord last night (= had two cas today, both were rather easy. I LOVE EMATH, yes i do. then had napfa! hahaha, first time i touched 38 for my sit and reach(dont laugh!) ooh yay and i think i got a gold! yay thankYou Jesus. after that, me, xinya, phoebe and junyi went to buy newspaper. then took an old man's cab and rushed all the way down to tm! (: charlie and the chocolate factory. missed quite abit of the first part but still was a nicenicenice show. we are like one of the firsts to watch it! :D oh happy people
fop is tmr! and sat and sun too. but no one is free tmr ): boo so i might not be going. but maybe im going? hee
i completed my history homework! (: and i havent blogged for ages.so yay so yay.

His love endures FOREVER (=

2005-07-24T21:15:00.000+08:00

and then? i dont know.

im so afraid.

JESUS HEALS

2005-07-22T17:16:00.000+08:00

You have turned my mourning into dancing, my sorrow into joy!

clarissa lim pw is beside me now!(: playing on my plastic clarinet(yah the one from china!) :D so we tried playing persis with the recording just now but FAILED )=
bar 135 is love <3
school wasnt fun at all. (sorry kat i snapped at you just now!) ohmeohmy ): i felt so err, exhausted after recess. like all my energy is gone (yah with the wind)

! shall go practise RUNNING NOTES with my dear.

byebye/ THREE AND A HALF

shar
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEETIE! (: i love you so much!

2005-07-21T22:12:00.000+08:00

JESUS HEALS

i am confused and thinking alot. i want to talk to someone! i think i talk too much heh =D today we had trial 2.4 run. it wasnt as bad as i thought it was gonna be and i was smiling all the way (: "Christ in me, Christ in me" was all that was on my mind. though my timing is like rather lousy but at least i didnt stop running and i didnt walk. i didnt feel tired/dying/sick like i usually would! praise the Lord(: these are the wonders. and caryl was thinking of persis while she ran! so cute/
yes we must work on persis. work, very, hard ): and i talked to naqiah today and im happy because "i understand how you feel" .
katH lent me HE CHOSE THE NAILS! oh its so nice, i shall read it later. who cares about eyebags!
beauty is in the eye of the beholder. there is not one person in this world who everyone agrees is pretty. so INNER BEAUTY! <- is the most important thing! yah, im inspired by that chinese passage thing from the chinese ca. i think i read that like 5 times cos i finished so early! (=
and phoebe's bloom book is good too!
boo my lit poem+medical report is very bad. clarissa is the professional.

my Jesus, my PRECIOUS SACRIFICE.

aww, too bad you're so unloved and deprived that you have to build your happiness on making others feel bad?

2005-07-17T18:42:00.000+08:00

Lord, You calm the storms in me /

thank God for kathleen ong! (: today i learnt that Christ is in me!Christ is in us! yay (= it's amazing.our God reaches out to us, He comes to us and loves us.
pastor prince is really humorous! =]
lit ca is due 22ndjuly! i thought it was tomorrow and i was panicking hahaha.

OLIGOPOLY (hahaha)

im precious and loved!

2005-07-16T23:49:00.000+08:00

You are the universe, all i need is You (=

slept the whole day away. then clarinet-ted, parent trap-ped, bible studied with shar! disney channel rocks. yay i love my friends

yes i will not be affected and you're not my friend

i dont know, why not you tell me.

how many times have i broken Your heart, but still You forgive, if only i ask.

2005-07-15T19:56:00.000+08:00

i once was lost but You found me and now im free .i need Your power to come and change me. Your spirit lives in me i wanna dance for all to see!

Lord, what compares to Your undying love for me? You're always by my side, guiding me, You will never forsake me. I NEED YOU.
i want to live for You and You alone. i dont want to drift away. Lord You are my strength and song. but i feel like im not doing enough for You ): why. i know nothing i do can ever be enough. but still... ah i want to be stronger in faith. i want to believe in You wholeheartedly.

ah i need to talk to someone. yes, went to bugis with clarissa(agaiN!) after listening. just the two of us. HURR. we didnt do much just ate (hee). i love corn soup. bio was interesting today. renee caught two dead bats or something and they were like mating halfway before they died. gross ): i dont like bats so scary looking! and we conclude today that the school isn't a safe place anymore. actually we all knew that long ago.

bye

2005-07-14T22:33:00.000+08:00

YO. so i screwed up both orals. yes listening is tmr. i have so much to do! :/ busybusy. i have to practise on my clarinet too because im sounding horrible. PLUS i have to practise amath for the spring test and also start on the remedial work i owe mrs lopez :X mrs lopez is so cute ! she's like so FUNNEH (X school was boring. it was nice praying together before oral. afterthat went to parkway with clare tian and char. clarissa limPW was acting like a big L and coming so close to me! she was insane ): plus she had designs on my card(and money)!
listening tomorrow! hmm yes. my sore eyes are not sore anymore! so i dont have to wear my spectacles to school tomorrow and i wont be called a nerd. whee
will be going to kbox with my cousin plus our family(?) tomorrow night! yay then will probably stayover at her house.
i get affected by what people say (and do) so easily. it's kind of a bad thing. yesyesyesyes. i will try

You are already clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. Remain in me and I will remain in you" John 15:3

i sing praises to Your name!

2005-07-10T21:41:00.000+08:00

When I say, "I am a Christian,"
I'm not shouting, "I am saved!
"I'm whispering, "I get lost;
That is why I chose this way."
When I say, "I am a Christian,
"I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
And need Someone to be my Guide.
When I say, "I am a Christian,"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak,
And pray for strength to carry on.
When I say, "I am a Christian,"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
And cannot ever pay the debt.
When I say, "I am a Christian,"
I'm not claiming to be perfect.
My flaws are all too visible,
But God believes I'm worth it.
When I say, "I am a Christian,"
I still feel the sting of pain.
I have my share of heartaches,
Which is why I speak His name.
When I say, "I am a Christian,"
I do not wish to judge.
I have no authority;
I only know I'm loved.

I ONLY KNOW I AM LOVED

2005-07-10T20:43:00.000+08:00

im so glad i went to church today [thank God for kat! (:] service was powerful! im smiling non-stop throughout the day! i feel so loved :D thank You Jesus. romans 8:31- If God is for us, who can be against us?
He died for MY SINS. HE LOVES ME. nothing can separate us from the love of God (: He does not condemn us. i was just telling kat this morning that i shall not be self conscious about my appearance and all that. then during service, pastor was saying that God looks beyond how we look like and how we dress. God is great, amen! i think there really is a big change in me this year =]
You gave Your life away for me, Jesus. i can never thank You enough for that. You love me even when im full of sin. You died for me, that's how much You love me. I LOVE JESUS.
(: i studied today. i didnt do the whole of amath 10.2 though. naqiah and deirdre's gonna laugh at me tomorrow when they find out.
i want to praise You, Lord, everyday. i want to live for You. not only on sundays after service, not only after concerts and conferences, but EVERYDAY.
i am scared there's english oral tmr and the dramatisation! through Him all things are possible.

(: Jesus Loves You !

2005-07-08T21:16:00.000+08:00

(: Glory to the risen King!

sharlyn i miss you remember i am always here for you okay! when we grow old we'll be the greatest grandfriends! (: yay
i completed my emath homework! plus practised my clarinet! am a happy girl.
i am talking to sharlyn now and sharlyn is talking to GEORGIA and some other person on the other line! ): so im left alone.
biology at the lab was fun today! (: nashitah is very cute haha and we made peanut juice, banana juice and cucumber juice! oh fun i want to drink banana milk.
im not myself today. was very motivated to work hard after chemistry in the morning. dont ask me why. then i became very happy throughout the day and came home early to study. and now i think im acting weird :X oh help
i sent only 5 msgs today? ): i can i can!
okay i am like being so weird.

i need to go to church on sunday. i want to love You forever. i want to tell the world that my God is an awesome God ! ohmy i need to talk to sharlyn.
(=

2005-07-04T19:33:00.000+08:00

WHY dont you even bother.
maybe she was right about you/

Math Makes Me Mad ): stefanie is not a good study partner because she likes to act like a teacher but cannot teach! i was weird today, no energy! ): ahh doing ss soon!

fatso.

2005-07-02T18:03:00.000+08:00

OHMY SHE IS ONE OF THE BOWLING PINS! :/

hahaha, super funny. we are the bowling balls X) but we're not strong enough to knock them down! heehee i was laughing at the screen just now ! so ridiculous.
i read letters from my batchies just now! (: they're all so cute. but all of them tell me not to be self conscious? i will try! clarissa is very cute. and so is audrey. hahaha
i love batchies. i think i say that in every entry! =)
so yesterday lessons seemed extremely long and boring :X thankGod i have naqiah and shittie and dee and stephanie(who kept calling me audrey) around me! (: amath was boring&AHH!) hmm after school we changed into our band u in class. SITINAQIAH(the madness!) was peeping at me while i wore my stockings! haha to think i trusted her! and i think i exposed myself infront of people! :X kat was a nice girl she accompanied me to the toilet! (: hahaha, then we waited for a long time before we went down for lunch! we were quite late already so everyone was rushing here and there. i sat with clare on the bus(promise/threaten) and we were talking about people's names and syllables! and we tried communicating with audrey and charmaine too X) when we got there it was very hot and we arranged the chairs and stands. the chinese orchestra was good! (: and the dancers were very revealing! hahaha the one with the rose and the rainbow, i couldnt stop laughing. suyan noticed them first! eww right. and the indian dancer with the cleavage ewww. talked quite alot with suyan cos she was the only one i could talk to! i had to sit outside all because of suyan's short skirt. and she kept asking me if i would miss her! (: haha. then i spotted weixun (black shirt) ahh TOUCHED! (: didnt expect him to come! and we kept looking away, yes we shall not look away. suyan said he looked abusive and violent. i say he looks bored. hahaha, funny. my lightstick was malfunctioning and i was short so no one noticed me! heh thankyou xinya, elaine, renee, stef, weixun, juniors, seniors who went to watch us! (: though we didnt play very well. after that we walked around, took photos and talked to people, then got back to school. thanks for the flowers, char and little boy! (: and xinya and elaine for the melting chocolates! i saw sharlyn at the end! heheh. that dirty girl. yay and i was glad i had stef to go home with me! (she dragged me up the bus wth! and we had no place to sit for a while) hee(: am a happy girl and i like the new nlb! read today's straits times! (: its so pretty and cool!
it has gardens and cafes and a theatre! :D

xinya and melting chocolate rocks! (: and i love the message on the melting chocolate! you know me so well! (: hahaha eyebags! ):

what is audrey doing! /eyebags/ messy hair hahaha

2005-06-28T22:30:00.000+08:00

everyday is a brand new start! (:

so today i said byebye to the loser/failure person yesterday and am happy! haha i must learn to be independent. Lord, yesterday when i saw only one set of footprints, i knew You were carrying me. You help me through my darkest moments (:
hmm, was hyper singing songs and jumping with jessica after school. even though it was only about 10 mins? i enjoyed it immensely! praise! then after that all my energy slowly drained away :/ ss and history papers were like shit(not equals love)
i love my batchmates and i thank God for them. although there are problems among us, we try and accept and put up with each others differences! no one is perfect right? right. we try! yes and thanks for putting up with me and all my shit (: i am really really glad i have them now. i thank YOU batchies for all the times we spent together, good and bad! really wonderful to know that there are a group of people who are always behind you! LIFE SUPPORT! (:

no longer I, but Christ in me!

2005-06-26T22:24:00.000+08:00

[VoS]xun [same same] says:is lee yu ping
[VoS]xun [same same] says:the black one?
[VoS]xun [same same] says:she's so black
[VoS]xun [same same] says:like indian

(*ŦК βαĐĐγ©*) all i want is one more day one more day with you* says:i am not black!
(*ŦК βαĐĐγ©*) all i want is one more day one more day with you* says:i am sort of mocha coloured if you din realise

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! (: yuping and xunnie! they're like making my toes laugh!

2005-06-26T22:08:00.000+08:00

HAPPY KIDS RULE! (:

i am getting hyper its all that three videos fault! hahahaha!

2005-06-26T21:41:00.000+08:00

yuxuan elaine xinya audrey !

get what i mean?

=)

2005-06-26T20:52:00.000+08:00

tralalalala
went to elaine's with xinya and aud!! (: videoed most of our songs into MTVS. all of them were super hilarious. and i hate the one with me flapping my wings and acting like a bird :X heh. and on our way back, the paper with my lyrics flew into the longkang! ): wth and those retards were laughing instead of helping! haha byebye paper. elaine says its somewhere in the singapore river now. it has my name on it! ): boo cant imagine how embarassed i am going to be when the class laughs at our work :X oh and today was so bloody and i hate newspapers i felt like a dog! ): all that elaine's fault please. went to yoshi with audrey after that. this fat guy at the counter was laughing at us, such an idiot. ohoh, and me and aud talked lots again! talking is fun. we never seem to run out of things to say(: and i got to see xinya today !
theres school tmr. i dont want! actually i dont mind chinese haha because we get to see VIDEOS! (: and other people singing. but please no emath or amath or ss or history. please.
plus there is band tmr. own up please

charmaine : hey i decided to write my message here since your tagboard has like so little space :X anyway, i just wanted to tell you that you've been doing great in everything. dont ever give up or lose hope and keep on doing your best ok! and all of us love you no one hates you! (: haha actually i wanted to tell you this quite some time ago but i kept forgetting! haha remember WE'RE ALWAYS BEHIND YOU! X)X) yay love you!

clarissa : heyhey dont worry when the time is right it will come! (: stop imagining things and saying silly stuffs like i think im "***ing" HAHAHA, you are so funny! anyway sometimes i wish i were like you. serious. HAHAH(: love!

my God is an awesome God !!!!!!!! =D

2005-06-26T02:41:00.000+08:00

whoo finally its done thankYou Jesus! :/ took me great pains ):

Not because of who i am But because of what You've done Not because not what ive done But because of who You are.

who am i Lord? that you would give me all Your love and forgive all my sins.

i know
I AM YOURS :D

2005-06-25T22:46:00.000+08:00

im changing my layout soon. heymath homework is still undone ): but i doubt i'll have the time to finish it tmr so.. arhh. june holidays are almost over! and as usual i wish i used the time i had on more constructive things like revision for chinese Olevels, homework etc
no time for ifonly s.

band. everything was just :X so disappointing? i thought whoever it was would have the courage to do what is right and all will be fine. i thought whoever it was would feel guilty. it seems all i thought was wrong. but why? who could be so heartless?
yes, it is wrong to accuse anyone of anything without any evidence. its a test God has put us to and i know He will bring us through it. He will!
audrey was right, no one can escape from God. ahh, everyone makes mistakes right.. its not too late to correct your mistake now! ):

audrey, keep that pretty smile on your face and dont let anyone make you sad! (: you're a great girl and all of us love you so much so dont frown you'll make us frown too! i'll be here anytime you need someone to call or whine to in your high pitched voice ok! remember we said we'll go through this together? all nine of us (: yes we will stick together.

we will stick together. i cant dance for nuts :/ but at least i can coordinate.well, sort of. haha. going to elaine's tomorrow! with xinya and audrey (: to video our MTV! hahaha.

SO I LOOK TO YOU, NO ONE ELSE COULD DO

and all i need is You (:

2005-06-20T22:50:00.000+08:00

we were meant to live for so much more
oh happy day, oh happy day! (: clarissa made my day today. haha, that girl makes me laugh and cry at the same time. im gonna change my layout soon i hope

ooh! sharlyn rocks (:
"why, why, WHY on earth would someone love us so much He'd die for us. when we did so much wrong. when we didn't even deserve it. when He could just destroy us all. He could. but He saved us all anyway.He saved us all anyway."
..and i know i am loved! :D i am who You want me to be. conference at cornerstone on saturday was good! (: haha we needed it! i thank God for shar :D it was wonderful praising God like that! -jumps heheh there is a change in me! couldnt really believe it myself at first (: we stepped forward to take responsibility ! -exclamationexclamation
EVERYTHING'S CHANGED,
EVERYTHING'S DIFFERENT! XD

thankYou Jesus for all my friends You have blessed me greatly with. they are like stars that bright up my life! (:

no one is perfectno one is perfectno one is perfectno one is perfectno one is perfectno one is perfectno one is perfectno one is perfectno one is perfectno one is perfectno one is perfectno one is perfectno one is perfect

i try to remind myself.
yah, dont give up even if hope seems so far away. dont be a quitter. im sure you'll see that your hard work will not be put to waste eventually. jiayou! (:

tell the world that He died for them
tell the world that He lives again! ((:

2005-06-17T22:21:00.000+08:00

FRIDAY/.

i amathed and emathed all the way! loaded photos from my phone too.
time flies, tuesday, 14th of June 2005(!)seems like such a long time ago. clarinet chalet was a blast! (: thankGod everything went fine. i really really love my section! towards evening time it was more like a mini batch bonding session. [we love sitting in circles] we talked alot, laughed alot, made confessions.. really talked ALOT about everything. love my batchmates to bits and pieces! its like, i feel so comfortable around all of them (: i still dont get why all my batchmates agreed that i am very dao and scary when im serious. boo. yes and i got to know people better, it was nice. loved double whacko and concentration ( me and clare=best partners ) :D i only realised that i didnt eat much that day when audrey told me. the stayover/satay stick club had a great time together, though it was quite scary at night. WE SURVIVED THE NIGHT! (: audrey wanyuan sihui rocked. we were all very scared but putting on a brave front. heheh/ we ate, peed, brushed teeth, slept together. haha. eeeks.
our juniors were sweet (: cooked for us and were being nice. was quite unexpected, really. thankyou juniors, touching.
we turned on all the lights and the tv was on full blast. woke up the next morning feeling like an icicle(?). i think i went back to bed afterthat (: heh. later, we packed up and had breakfast, then went to the beach. wanyuan(and the rest) were talking about the waves and using funny geog terms which were so foreign to me. then, aud's dad sent us to school!
woah band was so tiring i couldnt take it. (4 hours of sleep only) had a splitting headache and felt like puking. but once again, we survived it! a series of disappointment during band. hm, its up to you. sometimes i feel im doing things i shouldnt do? maybe, maybe..
went to parkway with audrey and clarissa after band. had noodles and COCONUTS (: oh yummy. talked more. i realised everyone has their own fair share of problems, yes? left the place rather late. another miracle happened ! (: i was happy! see, i was carrying this huge bag with my clothes+heavy file and my shoulder was aching. and i waited so long for the bus. (couldnt take a cab, spent all my money on coconut) so when i saw this single decked bus quite a distance away. (was waiting for 196 which is usually double decked) i prayed really hard that that was the bus. then tadaa! it was really a 196!hehehe! i nearly jumped(with joy) Praise the Lord! (: ooh, i love my God. there is nothing He cannot do ! just have faith and trust in Him and impossible is nothing!
on tuesday morning when i first met my batchmates : "your blouse looks so weird, you look so weird! "
on wednesday night when we left to go home : "ohmy i love my batchmates i really love you yuxuan"
heh those were the first, and last words that were said to me? HAHA (:
audrey,wanyuan,charmaine,sihui,sheena,clarissa,choonrui,asnira are God's greatest gifts (:
and i miss kathleen and sharlyn already!

oh, i still remember that i woke up at 1145 on thursday.
16th June, 1145/ clarissa says : omg i cant believe you still havent wake up! 1145 already lah whats your problem how can you still be sleeping.
SHE called so many times that my maid had no choice but to wake me up ): whaat. yes im talking about the clarissa who sleeps at 9 and wakes up at 8, and finds me weird :X but, i love clarissa!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO RACHAEL,
HAPPY BIRHTDAY TO YOU.
(haha is this counted as one paragraph?)
i love you rachael, alot alot! thanks for being such a fantastic friend who always show your white face and flash your wide smile (: i miss you and running to your table at the back! HAPPY FRIENDS FOREVER :D

(*ŦК βαĐĐγ©*) - rachh* to be yourself is all that you can do. says:RACHAEL LOVES NG YUXUAN LOTSLOTSLOTS K!(:

wow this is like longest entry of the year. OH, i want that pretty nine west sandals (: but its like onehundredandthirtyfivedollarsicannotafford. ARGH. mommy doesnt want to get them for me she thinks theyre "not nice"

(: hoho! tata.

2005-06-13T22:00:00.000+08:00

* we belong to tao nan school and we always obey the school rules the task of nation building we shoulder wisdom of sages past we deliver in harmony we work and play for tao nan will show us the way

tomorrow's the chalet. its been such a weird day. i was like mood swinging all the way ):
hyper vs. sad

hurt and disappointment. i knew it right from the start every single time i tried to believe

fairytales never exist

BEAUTIFUL SOUL VS PRETTY FACE

love, me

2005-06-12T22:37:00.000+08:00

PAINT IT BLACK

rose white. i chose rose white. AHH i dont like false hopes they're bad for health. just leave it to God. God's plan, amen.
i am so hungry. tuesday's the chalet/stayover! i pray that everything will turn out fine. hahaha, im excited =D hope it'll be good.
tomorrow i can use my tasty reeds! watched the cheerleading videos again. ohshit, im really bad at that.
my layout's awful :(

i shall go find something to eat.

2005-06-08T16:22:00.000+08:00

So I lay my head back down and I lift my hands and pray to be only yours I pray to be only yours I know now you're my only hope

she's only human.

2005-06-08T00:24:00.000+08:00

i dont miss sharlyn anymore ):

2005-06-08T00:06:00.000+08:00

you're my only one,

half my day was spent at ps with clare! the other half was at home sleeping ): we each bought a milkbottle.
clare : i feel like a teenage mother. (hahaha)
she's such a silly little thing! we bought many tasty reeds(trust me, i tried them already). anyway i tried drinking milk from that 120ml milkbottle and it took me about half an hour to finish the whole bottle
weixun : i think you must bite it.
plusplus, we got nice earrings! yay. that leaves me with very little money for the rest of the week. boo!
tried turning on my old computer, and it worked! haha, i want to play roller coaster tycoon 3 !

i miss sharlyn! where is my bestfriend?

happy birthday, my dear sister (she likes the presents!)

(:

2005-06-05T22:30:00.000+08:00

i did not go to church today ): all that shuwenstef's fault. SHE overslept.
me: hey stef get up!
stef (breathes loudly into the phone) : i really cannot wake up
me: nono we MUST go
stef(breathes in and out many times, loudly): cannot.we go next week.
so i woke up at NINE in the morning to hear that pig breathing over the phone(yuck) then i went back to sleep. i dont know what time i got up again, lazed around, ate some carrot cake(!!) and called xinya. xinya is the BEST i can tell her everything and we exchange beauty(?) tips hahaha! then i met stef(market woman with luggage) and we went bowling near the beach! i was not bad! (: hmm, walked up to the arcade and played a few silly games(i won once!) heh me and stef are so competitive. we cabbed to stef's house after that, walked/scooted to siglap video ezy! [her scooter is so lousy.yuck] rented a few vcds then headed for kfc! played uno with stef and her friend. ohmy i keep losing ): and im really antisocial and lousy.boo
then we walked/scooted back to her house again, i watched stef oogle at that ugly guy's photo. and came home!

boo ): what a long and boring entry ! plus its all about that shuwen. i cannot play roller coaster tycoon. i must call audrey now! (: bye

i'll remember everything for you ( hahaha, thats like the sweetest thing anyone can say!) [ps: go watch a moment to remember!]

i live for You

2005-06-03T23:12:00.000+08:00

r.k.narayan
i was having a fever this morning, like susila. flu+sore throat+weird eyes+felt like vomitting = young dying child.
i haven't touched my clarinet since two days ago and im beginning to miss it ): band freak?no, i hope not.
i kind of miss clarissa lim (: tj concert was super! i loved stage band hahaha/
oh wednesday. band. i was a failure yet again. i will never again take sectionals ok. like everyone kill that girl who made us repeat 111 a thousand times/ who cannot make everyone play 111 on time. ARGH. audrey and charmaine really are great people. went to raffles city after that! i think it was the first time i've talked to wanyuan for so long. and it was great ! =D we sort of cleared all our misunderstandings ? haha and we were like talking rather loudly at one point(quite embarassing) i love my batchmates ! and i miss calling audrey.
rachael hong is such a stupid and busywoman ):
ok, better drink more water and go to bed now? haha. been sleeping for the whole day. and i was sweating when i woke up(the air con was on!) sweat is gross.

Jesus was beautiful at every season of His life (:

2005-05-29T17:15:00.000+08:00

i need reeds ): glenn miller medley + jap graf VIII is love! gah i sound horrible though. my sister is also love, because she helped me with rhythm though i am rhythm-retard.

Praise the Lord, today's such a beautiful day! (:

i lost weight i lost weight!